The Real Reason You Exercise: To Get a Man

Tagline: "It's all about men."

This is exactly the type of idiotic advertising that companies do just to get a rise out of people so we'll all post it on our blogs and natter about it and give them lots of viral publicity and attention.

Sadly, I am unable to resist the bait and so I'm giving it to them. ("That's what SHE said!" ba-dum-bum.)

Men's Health magazine has launched a new advertising initiative ostensibly targeted at men but really aimed at getting the women folk up in arms. Probably because we're so cute when we make that little scrunchy mad face!

The basic gist - as you can plainly see; it's so unsubtle that I'm probably lowering your IQ by explaining it to you - is pictures depicting women exercising all alone, covered in sweat and exhausted. Why, you ask, is this poor woman blowing off a fun night with the girls to ride the one stationary bike in the deserted gym that isn't facing the beautiful scenic view? You see, it's because she wants a man. And as we all know (or at least so the magazines keep telling us), a man will only love us (subtext: will want to give us a good tumble on his high heat cycle *wink wink nod nod*) if we are svelte. Nay, not just svelte but skinny.

I mean, Lindsay Lohan's got nothing on this bony chick:

And this poor woman? Begging to have somebody jump out of the woods holding a chainsaw. Do women not watch horror movies? And why has nobody told us about reflective gear? And pepper spray??

The truly crappy thing about these ads are that they're partly true. As much as it pains me to write this, a primary motivating factor in getting women to exercise is their looks. You can enthuse about heart health and longevity and increased intelligence all you want and we'll all nod and agree. And then we'll jump on the elliptical and whine about how we're "working off dinner" last night or "running off the thigh jiggle". It's a sad state of affairs but it's true. And to any woman who denies being at least partially motivated to work out by her looks, I would ask "What if exercise gave you all the health benefits - but made you fatter. Would you still do it?" Of course not. It's why you see Katherine Heigl running on the treadmill for an hour and then lighting up a cigarette in the parking lot.

But there is one little nuance that the marketers forgot (perhaps intentionally?). Women don't get thin for men. We get thin for other women. We know that men like a few lady lumps. And yet we pursue perfect thinness. Not because it makes us more sexually desirable - often it has the opposite effect - but because it makes us the Alpha Female. We're competitive like that. Sigh. Stupid Men's Health.

I've created a poll. The optimist in me wants you all to prove me wrong. But the cynic in me just wants you to be honest. We can't change what we don't acknowledge. (Holy 900-pages-of-advertising-in-Vogue crap, did I just quote Dr. Phil on here??) Anyhow, those of you reading this post in a reader won't be able to see the poll unless you click thru, which you know you want to because any poll I create at midnight is guaranteed to be awesomely awful!

Can You Spot-Reduce Your Thighs

Leave it to an incorporeal computer to give me a reality check about my body. Somewhere Isaac Asimov is smiling. But just as the Internet giveth, so does the Internet taketh away... and now I'm just confused.

Every woman has a body part that she just doesn't like much. (Strike that - while most women do, I imagine there are some who love every inch of themselves and more power to them!) Oh sure we'll gripe about there-ain't-no-love-in-these handles (so says TurboJennie) or our Oprah-waves-goodbye upper arms (so says Oprah) but there is usually one extra special body part that we focus most of our attentions on. For me, that part is my thighs.

I've had a love-hate (but mostly hate) relationship with those womanly fatty bits pretty much ever since I came to associate "womanly" with "fatty bits" - so you know, like 5 years old. My "athletic" thighs are the reason I go through denim hell trying to find jeans that fit. Every single pair I own is too big in the waist and too tight on the thighs. Why oh why have shoulder pads, leggings, dingy flannels and for the love of unholy fashion banana clips come back into style but not my precious 90's sk8r grrrl wide-legged jeans? Clearly the pants aren't the problem, it's got to be my legs! (Now be a good little consumer and write that 100 times on the chalkboard before you leave adolescence.)

All I wanted were legs that didn't touch anywhere between ankle and pelvis; is that too much to ask for? Yes, yes it is. Even at my skinniest-skinny (to quote the adorable Ginnifer Goodwin who also shares my thigh woes) my thighs were still best friends. And, as any reputable personal trainer will tell you, there is no such thing as spot reduction. Or - say it with me! - "everyone who chews gum would have the skinniest face ever!" Thank you endless stream of P.E. teachers and personal trainers for that witticism. Basically Suzanne Sommers was selling you snakeoil in the form of a spring-loaded contraption you pumped between your legs that was just this side of socially acceptable.

But conventional wisdom is wrong on this one, says Tim Ferriss, author of the hugely controversial and popular book The 4-Hour Body: An Uncommon Guide to Rapid Fat-Loss, Incredible Sex, and Becoming Superhuman. (You have an hour to kill? Go read the reviews on that sucker - your head will spin faster than Christina Aguilera in a shoe store.) For those of you uninitiated into the Ferriss-verse, he is known for being a human lab rat and trying out every body hack imaginable. Similar to yours truly in concept only - that man tries stuff so far on the other side of extreme that I wouldn't do even if you paid me in Lululemon outfits. I can't comment on the whole book - haven't read it yet although I plan on doing so - but he put up a "bonus" chapter on his blog about, oh yes, spot reducing the upper thighs on women. According to him it is possible. And for the low low price of $39.99.

Apparently I am not alone in my dilemma. Ferriss, to his credit, really does his homework and the whole science-y explanation is on his site. Here's the short version: he tried two creams containing compounds that theoretically had the chemical properties to alter fat storage under the skin. The prescription cream failed. But the other cream - a super gimmicky sounding CelluThin - actually did work. It reduced his body fat measurement on his treated thigh by 1 mm. I know 1 mm doesn't sound like much but he isn't measuring the circumference of his thigh with a tape measure but rather measuring his fat thickness and 1 mm is a big deal there. I almost bought the CelluThin on the spot.

But then something else caught my eye (ooh, shiny!) - a designer clothing site having a super clearance sale. (I know, I know we talked about this but I was just looking I SWEAR. I did not buy a thing. Just drooled on my keyboard.) This site, weirdly, was called MyShape. I say "weirdly" because fashion is never about my shape. Fashion could care less what shape I actually am. It's all about making me fit into their shape. But this site is based off the idea that women should by clothing according to their actual body shape. Forget "apples" and "pears" - this site offers 7 different types to choose from.

Being the Cosmo-esque quiz lover I am, I read through all the body types and picked the one I thought I was but when I tried to go further into the store, it stopped me. They wanted measurements. And not just your bust-waist-hip that we've all got memorized but about 20 different measurements including everything from the breadth of your shoulders (another problem spot for me, holla for the pull-ups!) to the height of your knee above the floor. Curiouser than Alice in CotureLand, I pulled out my trusty tape measure and went to work.

15 minutes and a ton of numbers entered later, I closed my eyes and clicked submit. (Not really. Not even I'm good enough to web surf blind.) It gave me an "S" shape. (Another bonus: their shapes are just named by letter with no judgement word attached to it like "athletic" or "curvy" or "boyish.") Turns out an S shape is "evenly proportioned." Excuse me? My thighs aren't transplants from Godzilla?

As kooky as it sounds it made me realize that maybe I don't want skinnier thighs. What if I got my dream of an inch off each thigh - would my shoulders look freakishly large then? Would my hips look weird? What if the problem isn't my body not fitting the clothes, like I'd assumed for so many years, but rather the clothes not fitting my body? I'm just going to come out and say it - for the first time I can remember - I like myself the way I am, thighs touching and everything. You can keep your cream.

Have any of you ever tried a spot-reduction technique or cream? Did it work for you? Do you remember a moment where you learned to like yourself? What sparked the change in you? Or are you still looking for it? Opinions on Tim Ferriss or The 4-Hour Body??

What is Your Most Important Fitness Tool

I salute the master of the no-slip hair clip! Do you think that wire leads to a battery pack?

What is the one thing you absolutely cannot workout without? Working out as long as I have and in as many different situations as I have (and losing as many brain cells as I have), I have forgotten pretty much every conceivable item. Yes that includes underwear. But I have learned that almost always there is a way to work around what you're lacking.

No sports bra? Your regular one or even your cami with the built-in shelf bra (which honestly is only a "bra" for 12-year old girls and is a wardrobe malfunction waiting to happen for the rest of us) will do in a pinch.

No heart rate monitor? Take your pulse the old fashioned way on your neck. (Just don't press so hard you pass out.)

No shoes? My friend Leah once famously did a TurboKick class in her socks rather than miss her workout. My husband has run a mile in his work shoes. And just last month I lifted weights in my snow boots due to my keys making an impromptu trip to work with my husband.

No deodorant? Make some by making a paste with your spit and some diaper rash cream. Yeah, I actually tried that once. I can't say that it didn't work though - my armpits definitely didn't smell like sweat! Not that Desitin is preferrable to b.o.

But there is one thing I simply cannot exercise without: a hair tie. I can't stand having hair on my neck and in my face. I'll use bobby pins, head bands and flower clips as well but always in conjunction with a rubber band. Gym Buddy Krista once asked me if I was into Kabbalah because she thought the red ponytail holder that I always wore on my left wrist was a red Kabbalah string. Being as attached to hair ties as I am, I've tried them all and they've all been okay but then the other day Gym Buddy Allison showed up with these:

These do not fall out or slip at all! You know those cute ponytails where you pouf it up a little bit at the crown but they never stay without booby-trapping them with 100 bobby pins because the hair band doesn't hold tight enough? My poufy pony lasted all day today! (I cannot believe I just wrote that.) No bobbies, no slipping!

They may look like the jelly bracelets of your youth but these Scuni "evolution" bands are actually the cutest tightest don't-get-stretched-outiest hair ties you have ever used! And they come in clear in case you don't like looking as Rainbow Brite as I do! I can't believe I'm this excited about a rubber band but there you go. It's the little things in life.

What's the one thing you can't workout without? Have you ever done a crazy "fix" because you forgot something important? How do you keep your hair out of your face?

The Exercise Widow(er) Phenomenon [Coming to a marriage near you?]

Do you or someone you love suffer from the following symptoms?

- Attending only parties that serve salted nut rolls and Powerade.

- Picking up 8 pairs of different (but still look pretty much the same) running shoes every evening.

- Waking up alone to an empty bed and a note that says "8 miler, lake route, love you." Every morning.

- Is flying solo every Saturday morning and much of the weekends.

- Has to wash a separate load of laundry made up of just sweaty workout clothes every few days.

- Has a separate budget category for exercise gear, race fees, special food and stock shares in Gu.

If so, you may have Exercise Widow(er) Syndrome. Other symptoms may include dry mouth (from never being able to find a clean water bottle), headache (from waiting at a freezing finish line for 2 hours), and fatigue (from being a single parent during race season). Please talk to your doctor immediately. While there currently is no cure for EWS, it can be managed with drugs (anti-depressants for you, valium for them). Even if you are not having an active outbreak, EWS can still be contagious.

While I've written quite a bit about what it's like to be an exercise addict, I must admit I haven't given much thought to what it's like to be married to one. (Dear husband, I'm sorry.) That is until Reader Laura of Absolut(ly) Fit tipped me off to an article in the Wall Street Journal titled "A Workout Ate My Marriage." I was giggling my way through it until about halfway down I realized my husband could have written it. Suddenly it got a lot less funny.

While addictions causing strain in marriages isn't new - the damage that workaholics, shopaholics, gambleaholics (yes I made that word up) and of course alcoholics do to family relationships is well documented - the healthy living twist is relatively new. As anyone who has ever trained for a triathlon or marathon or other competition knows, it is really time consuming. Especially with endurance sports, a large part of training is just putting in the hours. And unless you have a spouse or partner who is training with you most of those hours will be spent by yourself or with a training group, taking you away from home and family. (Dear husband, I'm really sorry.)

The Journal explains, "With exercise intruding ever-more frequently on intimacy, counselors are proposing a new wedding vow: For fitter or for fatter. 'Exercise is getting more and more couples into my office,' says Karen Gail Lewis, a Cincinnati marriage and family therapist."

Exercise is an admirable pursuit and I think most people truly want their loved one to be healthy and happy. In fact, I've read (way too many) letters to advice columnists asking how to get less-healthy spouses to get bit by the health bug. The real issue here, I think, is not the exercise per se but the inequality extreme amounts of exercise introduces into the relationship.

"Commitment to a demanding training schedule cuts to the heart of the issues couples often find themselves fighting about—who does chores, who gets time for themselves and who decides where and how the family has fun.

The threat can go beyond time issues. If one partner gets a new, buff appearance and a new circle of buff acquaintances, romantic possibilities can open up—and give the other spouse good reason to feel insecure about his or her own physique."

Okay so that last one really isn't a problem for me - no one hits on me, ever, and my husband is every bit as handsome as the day I married him - but the other issues strike very close to home.

I've talked both here on my blog and in my book about how at the height of my compulsive over-exercising I ran a marathon distance and then went straight to an hour-long kickboxing class (and then fainted and had a heart arrhythmia blah blah blah) but there is another part to the story, one I didn't really think about until today. The part where my husband watched the children while I ran for nearly 4 hours and worried because I was gone so long. The part where my husband wanted to go play Ultimate Frisbee (his passion) when I finally came home but was afraid to leave me because he knew I was going to go to the gym. The part where my husband took my shoes, my car keys and all the kids' car seats so I couldn't do further damage to myself. (For those of you who haven't read the book, I got the spare car seats out of the garage, found our spare key and grabbed my old shoes and went anyway.) The part where my husband finally stepped in and said, "This is enough. You're finished. You have to go back to therapy." That must have felt awful for him.

Dear husband, I am so so very sorry.

In the article, the main man profiled, an amateur triathlete named Jordan Waxman, admits after the reporter lists all the ways he's brushed off his family for his training, "It's selfish." He's exactly right. Reading the article through the first time I wanted to smack him for all the crap he's put his wife and kids through just so he can go ride his expensive tricked-out bike in a race he paid hundreds of dollars to enter and thousands of dollars to travel to just so he could cross an arbitrary finish line. But then I began remembering similar stunts of my own and while they never entailed flying to another state they do look pretty selfish in hindsight.

Mr. Waxman, however, remains unapologetic at the end. Even after an "intervention" staged by his wife and extended family begging him to exercise less he "stood his ground. In his view, his athletic ambition shouldn't have surprised his wife. It arose from the same qualities that drove him to obtain two law degrees, an MBA and his position at Merrill Lynch." His training paid off when he swam the English Channel.

While he says that he hopes his accomplishments will be "an inspiration" to his children, it feels hollow. Kids don't care if you swam the English Channel. Heck my kids don't even care if I accomplished brushing my teeth. (The other day my son said to me, "Mom your breath smells like pickles. I love pickles!" Oops.) But kids care a lot if you're there at dinner and in the audience at their choir performance and cheering at their soccer games and praying with them at bedtime.

The article then goes on to point out that this "Divorce by Triathlon" phenomenon is only problematic in some relationships. Some couples have a shared passion of exercise and they train and race and carbo-load together (the couple that gets runner's tummy together, stays together!). Other spouses are simply not bothered by their partner's extreme exercise, choosing to pursue interests of their own. It does seem to me that if you have children then that makes the situation a lot trickier. (More people = more needs to be met.) I think the fact that this article exists at all is evidence that this issue is becoming more and more a problem.

While I've done a lot of work trying to heal myself of this addiction and all of the crazy thought patterns surrounding it - work that is going quite well I think! - I don't think I've done nearly enough to repair the relationships that I damaged during that time. Fortunately my husband and I have an unspoken agreement: when he's down, I'm there for him and when I fall, he picks me up. In the past I've been able to be his strength when he had none left and I'm so grateful that he was brave enough to take away my shoes when that's what I needed most.

What do you think of Mr. Waxman's story - selfish or inspiring? What do you do if you and your partner have hugely different levels of interest in fitness? How do you balance exercise in your relationship?

How (Not) To Use a Sandbag [Gym Buddy Workout Videos!]

Daria and I model our sandbags. Hers is leaking black coal dust down her back and yet she's still smiling. What a trouper!

Ever had your butt handed to you by a piece of fitness equipment? Well I sure did. Our very first day of the Sandbag Experiment ended with sandbag: 20, Charlotte: 0. One of the first moves we attempted is a clean and press. I've been doing those for years with the bar so I figured it wouldn't be too bad with the sandbag. I was so so wrong. The shifting of the weight really threw me off (literally). Lest you think I'm good at everything I try, behold the blooper reel:

Gym Buddy Allison comes in at the end to show me how it's really done and of course manages to not only do them perfectly but also makes them look like a piece of cake! That bag may look small but it's 50 freaking pounds. I still haven't managed a decent clean and press.

Here are the Gym Buddies demonstrating a few other moves that are particularly challenging with a sandbag:

Making Your Own Sandbag

While I got my nifty sandbag (best part: all the handles!) from Ultimate Sandbags, we need more than one bag between all the Gym Buddies. So today Allison and I both attempted to make our own. I took an old school backpack and filled it with 30 pounds of wheat poured into smaller sacks and sealed off. Any of you who are Mormon will immediately understand why I happened to have 30 pounds of wheat lying around my house but for the rest of you, you can fill it with whatever you have handy: kitty litter (unused!), rice, beans, a wiggly toddler, gravel... very small rocks. Allison made hers by filling a duffle bag with an old leaky sandbag the Y happened to have and wrapping it in a garbage bag. Two free sandbags, 10 minutes! Now you have no excuse for not doing this Experiment with us!

Extra Credit: The Crazy TRX Move You Must Try!

This is what we do to bad Gym Buddies - we hang them up in a TRX and leave them. Just kidding! Megan's demo'ing a crazy move I found on the TRX website. You know you want to try it!

Have you ever had your butt kicked by a piece of fitness equipment? Have you tried a fun or crazy move that we should try? Have you made a piece of equipment yourself?

Failed Experiment: Community Supported Agriculture

Pop quiz: what do stinging nettles, horseradish whips and burdock clubs all have in common? They may all sound like instruments of torture but actually they are foods my CSA (community supported agriculture) farm considers edible. I, on the other hand, consider them... instruments of torture.

Did you even know that you can eat stinging nettles? Indeed, the noxious weed that you spent most of girl scout camp trying to avoid, is considered a delicacy by some people. The only problem is, well, the stinging part. According to the directions that came in the handy-dandy CSA member newsletter, if you rinse the greens three times, then boil them, and then saute them, you are good to go. That seemed like a lot of work to get my green quotient in but, hey, I'm an adventurous eater so why not? Oh, and by the way, you are supposed to wear gloves while handling the vicious little suckers.

Apparently three times was not enough rinsing. The greens bit back. Hard. Evolutionary advantage: plants, 1; me, 0.

At first blush, CSAs seem like a great opportunity. You pay a certain amount of money - often called a membership fee - to a local farmer at the beginning of the season and in return you get weekly baskets of local, organic, picked-that-day produce awesomeness. If you are lucky, it will even wind up being cheaper that buying your produce at your nearby Demon Superstore that imports all your produce and then wraps them un-environmentally friendly plastic bags (obnoxious teenage bag boys come free of charge). For many people, it works out exactly as advertised. In fact, CSAs have become a popular cost-cutting measure advocated by every magazine from Money to Baby Talk.

My first clue that I wasn't going to get my happily ever after should have been that I live in Minnesota. CSA farms are local and therefore provide only what grows locally. Do you know what grows in Minnesota? Six months out of the year when temps are below zero the answer is a big fat nothing. Snow cones, anyone? The other six months of the year are divided between blistering heat, wicked humidity and thunderstorms the like of which I have never before seen. (Side note: one thunderstorm we had a year ago actually caused my friend who moved here from Texas to hide behind her couch. You know it's a heck of a thunderstorm when a Texan thinks a dumpster just got dropped on her house.) So basically we get some good apples (if the hail doesn't get them first), corn (that they sell for everything but eating), and the rest is only stuff that grows under the ground and therefore is safe from the ravages of nature that we live in.

Every month we live here, my husband and I gain respect for Ma, Pa and besmocked Laura and Mary in their drafty, tiny, Little House in the Big Woods.

But the one thing that CSAs don't often advertise is that they're like the mafia. Once you're in, you're in for life. Or until you sell your share to someone else. And so my husband and I decided to stick it out for the year. This is what we learned:

1. There are 27 different varieties of turnips: black, gold, pea-sized, big-as-your-head and even candy cane striped. We also learned that we don't like turnips. Turnips bought in the store are crunchy and mildly sweet. Turnips grown in Minnesota have serious heat. They're like a very spicy radish except you have to chew it longer thereby prolonging the pain. If I was any less of a mother, I'd post video of my son trying to amputate his tongue with his fingers after accidentally eating one. Poor baby made his father feed him for the next 3 weeks, refusing to take anything from my hand.

2. Root vegetables will rule the earth. People talk about cockroaches being the only living thing to survive a nuclear holocaust but my money is on celeriac, burdock, parsnips, rutabagas, beets and of course turnips. I tried putting them in soups and stews, hotdishes (that's Minnesotan for casserole) and salads. I tried roasting, stir frying, pickling and blanching. No matter what I did they all tasted vaguely like crunchy dirt. Although I did discover the one week we had beets with every meal that even though it looks like you have just pooped out a mass of bloody red entrails, it is actually just beetjuice-tinted excrement. Phew! My favorite of these roots though were the horseradish whips. You know what horseradish tastes like right? Well that sinus-cleanser comes from a root. Don't let them fool you - there is no method of cooking on the planet that makes raw horseradish tolerable in anything more than minuscule amounts.

The bonus is that these starchy veggies last forever. I finally gave up trying to use them all (seriously, in one week we got three celeriacs the size of footballs!) and just kept adding them to a box in my basement. I now have 50 pounds of roots that show no signs of decomposition despite some of them being several months old. Will we ever eat them? Only if there is a nuclear holocaust.

3. CSAs operate on weird schedules. I had to drive 20 minutes to my pick-up site which was only open between 1 and 5 in the afternoon on Thursdays. For anyone who holds down a normal job, this obviously falls during working hours (and doesn't even include lunch time!). For moms like me this interferes with the one absolutely sacred time in my schedule: nap time. The only people that might have found this convenient would be retired folk or frat boys with no afternoon classes.

4. The weather is king. Part of the risk you assume when you sign up for a CSA is that not only do you share the bounty of the farmer, you also share their loss when weather destroys crops. We found this out the hard way only a month into our season when severe thunderstorms damaged half of their crops beyond repair.

While we got to try a whole lot of things I've never eaten before - and seriously I thought I'd tried everything - not much of it was worth eating. The produce that my family really enjoys eating like peppers, tomatoes, cucumbers, salad, melons and fruit just don't grow here. There were a few things I really enjoyed. The spinach was divine. The apples were perfect. The carrots were heavenly. But I ended up spending just as much money at the store buying "normal" things like lettuce. Even the things we thought we would love, like watermelon, ended up being a disappointment. (Our one and only watermelon we got last summer was the size of a softball and was white through and through. Not a single edible bite! Ditto for the muskmelon.) It ended up being a colossal waste of money and a such a source of frustration that it has ended up being a punchline in our house. If you can't cry, then you might as well laugh!

My advice to anyone considering a CSA is to check out where you live first. Californians and Hawaiians are A-OK, lucky stiffs. My sister in Colorado and brother in Utah have had good experiences with their CSAs. And I've heard the south is so fertile that vegetables do everything but jump in your kitchen window. But if your state borders Canada or ends in "Dakota" you might want to consider there is a reason 90% of your food is imported.

Second, look at what you really like to eat. If those things aren't included on your CSA list then you probably will end up buying them at the store anyhow thereby negating your monetary savings.

Third, get recommendations from other locals regarding which farms are the best. Local Harvest is a great website to start from as it lists all the farms in your vicinity with their contact and CSA information but nothing beats the opinion of your neighbors.

Some people love their CSA like family. Me? I didn't. We'll stick to the farmer's market, thanks.

Any of you use a CSA? What has your experience been? What is the weirdest fruit or vegetable you've ever eaten?

PS> While I like to knock Minnesota's weather, I do love living here! There are many many great things about this place (like being named #3 healthiest city in the US! woot, woot!!) but nothing I love more than the people. They are kind and helpful and generous and make wonderful friends and I only hold them a little responsible for the weather.)

Level 4 Gymnastics Bar Requirements

When a gymnast is performing their level 4 gymnastics bar routine they will only use one bar, the low bar. A gymnast may use a mat or a spring board to mount the bar; this must be removed as soon as the gymnast mounts. If the gymnastics mat or spring board is not removed the gymnast will receive a deduction from her gymnastics bar routine score.

MAIN LEVEL 4 GYMNASTICS BAR SKILLS, REQUIREMENTS, AND DEDUCTIONS!

*Glide Swing- Must take off with two feet and land with two feet. Must have great body extension. Hands must remain on the bar between the glide and pullover.

*Pullover-Must pull over with two feet. Do not jump, hop, or step into the pullover. Make sure the landing is in a front support with straight arms and a tight body.

*Front Hip Circle-Maintain a straight hollow body. Must connect a small cast while coming out of the front hip circle.

*Shoot Through (Single Leg Squat Through)-Leg /foot cannot contact or touch the bar when shooting through. Show a stride support at the end of the shoot through (hands are the only thing touching the bar).

*Mill Circle (Forward Stride Circle)-Must show clear stride support at the beginning and end (only thing touching the bar is your hands). Do not hook knee on the bar when doing this skill. Be sure to  flip your hands backwards before doing this gymnastics bar skill.

*Cut Back- Be sure to change your hand position before cutting back. Keep arms straight and end in an extended front support when cutting back.

*Cast- Keep proper body alignment. Maintain a hollow, straight body from shoulders to toes.

*Back Hip Circle- Keep a straight hollow body position while maintaining hip/thigh contact on the bar the entire time. Must connect the back hip circle and underswing dismount.

*Underswing Dismount-Once again, maintain a straight hollow body with straight arms and a great body extension with flight. Stick your landing!

A gymnastics bar routine should not be choppy but should show connections and fluidity throughout the entire routine. Each gymnastics bar skill should lead to the next without any breaks in rhythm.

Level 4 Gymnastics Beam Routine Requirements

Gymnastic beam is one of two events in gymnastics that are timed. A level 4 gymnastics beam routine time limit is 50 seconds. If a gymnast goes over her time she will receive a 0.10 deduction from her beam score. Based on the height of the beam and gymnast, a mat or spring board may be needed to mount the gymnastics beam. This is allowed as long as the extra mounting surface is removed as soon as the gymnast mounts. If it is not removed the gymnast will receive a deduction from her beam score.

LEVEL 4 GYMNASTICS BEAM- MAIN GYMNASTICS VAULT SKILLS, REQUIREMENTS, AND DEDUCTIONS!

*Leg Swing Mount-Must turn 180 degrees in a continuous motion ending in a straddle sit with correct body position

*V-Sit to Tuck Stand-must maintain a straight and hollow body position until both feet are above the beam. Once legs are above the beam pull them in to land in a tuck stand.

*Heal Snap Turn-When stepping in coupe you must remain on toe until foot arrives next to ankle. Once the foot arrives at ankle go flat then rise in releve to perform a heal snap turn. Once the turn is finished, immediately drop to a flat foot and pause.

*Leap-leg separation on the leap must be a minimum of 60 degrees. Must maintain straight legs and pointed toes throughout the leap and land in a low, paused, arabesque position

*Handstand-Handstand must be ¾ minimum. Be sure to lever in and out of the handstand while stretching out body and closing legs at the top. Hands must be side by side while in the handstand; they cannot be staged.

*½ Turn-Must complete a 180 degree turn on toe; show control before stepping out to finish.

*Straight Jump (Stretch Jump)-Push through toes to get great height while maintain a straight body and close feet together during the jump.

*Tuck Jump-Tuck must be a minimum of 90 degrees. Tuck must be tight and quick and must open before landing back on the beam

*Arabesque- Back leg must lift behind at a minimum of 45 degrees and must be held for at least 1 second.

*Scale- Back leg must lift a minimum of 90 degrees and be held for at least 2 seconds. The Gymnast must keep both legs locked out and chest up while performing both the scale and arabesque.

*Pivot Turn-Stay in full releve while completing a sharp and tight 180 degree turn.

*Dismount- Must maintain a straight tight body while doing a cartwheel to side handstand. Once at the top legs much touch together and be held for a minimum of 1 second. After being held, do a ¼ turn dismount. Body should remain straight from start to finish.

Gymnastics beam is all about balance. Make sure your routine is not lacking in connections and/or rhythm. Each gymnastics skill needs to lead into the next with grace and aggressiveness.

Level 4 Gymnastics Floor Requirements

USA Gymnastics has specific required routines for compulsory levels (gymnastics level 1 through level 6). USAG has precise guidelines, rules, time limits, and a code of points for each event. USA gymnastics level 4 floor routine has specific gymnastics skills that have required guidelines one must meet. If these guidelines are not met, the gymnast will receive deductions from their overall score.

LEVEL 4 GYMNASTICS FLOOR ROUTINE- MAIN GYMNASTICS FLOOR SKILLS, REQUIREMENTS, AND DEDUCTIONS!

*Split Jump- Leg separation in the split jump must have a minimum of 90 degrees.

*Handstand Straight Arm Forward Roll- when performing a handstand forward roll the gymnast must hit vertical with legs together and hold for a minimum of 1 second.

*Handstand Bridge Kick-Over- While doing a handstand bridge kick over, arms must remain straight and up at ears the entire time. When the gymnast hits the top of the handstand legs must me together before continuing into the bridge. When in the bridge you must shift shoulders over hands before kicking over. Make sure a minimum leg split of 120 degrees is achieved when kicking over. Show a levering action and obtain control throughout this gymnastics skill.

*Leap Step Hop- Push off with front leg when taking off for leap. Leap must have a minimum of a 90 degree split. Make sure legs swings forward to a minimum of horizontal on the hop.

*Split- Must be all the way down with straight legs.

*Straight Arm Backward Roll into Pushup- Hands must touch the ground before rolling backwards. While rolling, maintain straight arms and land in a push-up position.

*Coupe Half Turn- When turning one must complete 180 degrees turn while in releve (on toe) and coupe (your foot at your ankle). Show control throughout the entire turn.

*Round-off Back Handspring Rebound- When performing a round-off back handspring rebound the gymnast must show acceleration. Be sure the round-off passes through vertical and both feet land at the same time.

Legs must stay together throughout the back handspring and it must be landed with two feet. As soon as the back handspring is landed, immediately rebound , stick and control the landing.
Make sure you keep good fluidity and rhythm throughout the entire level 4 gymnastics floor routine.

Gymnastics Floor Exercise

In womens artistic gymnastics there are four apparatuses: gymnastics floor exercise, uneven bars, vault table, and balance beam.
Gymnastics floor exercise is one out of two events that are competed by both men and women. Out of all the events, floor exercise is favored by most. Floor takes a vast amount of strength, power, endurance, flexibility, grace, and gymnastics dance.

The floor exercise has springs underneath, for this reason many people refer to them as spring floors. The standard size for a spring floor is 12 meters by 12 meters. This size makes it a perfect square.

A spring floor is made out of tons of small springs that are covered by plywood, the plywood is covered by thick foam padding, and the foam padding is covered by carpet. The carpet has four taped lined along the outside, these are called the boundary lines. A gymnast must stay inside these lines when performing his/her routine. If a gymnast steps outside these lines they will receive a deduction.

Levels one through six all have the exact same choreographed gymnastics floor routine. Once a gymnast becomes a level seven they get to pick their very own floor music and have a gymnastics floor routine choreographed to fit her skills and style.

Floor Exercise is where the gymnasts get to express who they are as a gymnast. A gymnast expresses her character and ability through the tumbling, leaps, jumps, skill, turns, etc. she puts into her routine. Her personality also gets expressed though the music she chooses, and the type of gymnastics dance she selects and puts in her routine.

How to Select the Perfect Gymnastics Leotard!

Gymnastics leotards are so cute theses days compared to when I was a gymnast. Back then (only 10 years ago) there was one main style and all were solid colors, yuck! How boring is this?
Today’s gymnastics leotards are a totally different story. There is such a wide selection: sparkles, studs, rhinestones, shimmers, glitter, cutouts, crisscross, velour, lycra, high cut, low cut, embroidery, flowers, hearts, flames, razor back, metallic, long sleeved, three quarter sleeved, sleeveless, etc. Variety is the keyword for gymnastic leotards of the twenty-first century!

It is very hard to pick out the perfect leotard because of the great variety but variety is what makes it so much fun! Here are a few tips that will help you and your gymnast pick out the perfect gymnastics leotard specifically for her.

• MATERIAL- Make sure you select a material that your gymnast like the feel of, especially if they have sensitive skin. Many of my gymnasts are picky and if they select the wrong material they tend not to wear it because it is, “too itchy.”

• CUT- This is usually all about your gymnast preference, do they like high cut or lower cut styles around their legs?

• SLEEVE STYLE-Do they like sleeveless, three quarter sleeves, or long sleeves. Many people choose sleeveless because it much cooler when working out and doing gymnastics.

• CUTOUTS- These are cute, little holes that are cut out on the sides or in the back of a leotard. You and your gymnast have to decide if this is appropriate for her and if she would be comfortable in it.

• STRAPS- There is many different strap types. Gymnastics leotards now have spaghetti straps, crisscrossed, racer back, etc. Make sure you select one that is comfortable for your gymnast. If she wears a bra please select one that doesn’t show her straps or any part of her bra; this is extremely tacky.

• COLOR and DESIGN- First you must decide what style, cut, material, and straps, you want. Now comes the fun part! It is now time to select the color and design that you have been longing for!

Competition Gymnastics Leotards VS. Gymnastics Workout Leotards

One of the things a gymnast needs for gymnastics is a leotard; but not just any leotard, they needs to be a girls gymnastics leotards. Girls gymnastics leotards are much different then dance leotards. Gymnastics leotards are tight around the thighs which reduces wedgies. Dance leos are loose around the legs and are cut much higher which is not suitable for gymnastics.
Leotards for gymnastics have come a long way. Back in the day they were extremely plain and not very colorful; now days they are super cute. They come in all different colors, styles, patterns, materials, and designs.

There are two different types of gymnastics leos: workout and competition. A workout leotard is used only at gymnastics practice. They can consist of any color, cut, or style. Workout leotards are picked out and chosen by the gymnast based on their personal preference. Competition leotards are only used at gymnastics meets or gymnastics competitions. A Competition gymnastics leotard consists of the gymnast’s team colors and is more professional looking. They cannot contain holes in the back (cutouts), have crisscrossed straps, or be high cut. They have to have at least two inch straps but are usually long sleeved. A Competition gymnastics leotard is usually decided on by the gym owner, coaches, or the whole team.

When picking out competition leotards you must keep in mind to pick something that bra straps won’t hang out of. At gymnastics meets the gymnast can get a deduction if their straps (or any undergarments) are showing.

Colleagues are a climbing

Finally, after two years I have managed to get some of my co-workers to come climbing with me. Katie Mabie and Teresa Yan each want to go and check out the new climbing wall in Everett (Metro Rock Gym). This new gym blows away the other gyms in the area and it is creating interest in the climbing community. I love bringing beginners to the gym for the first time, it is always exciting to watc.

Weekend Warrior -- Videos to Get You Stoked!

We are in the middle of the ice season and the ice is in to varying degrees throughout the west. So today is a celebration of ice climbing in all it's forms, from glacier to waterfall ice.

First we have a video of AAI Guide Dawn Glanc sending glacier ice on her American Mountain Guides Association European Guide Aspirant Exam. Dawn is an excellent ice climber and often does very well in the Ouray Ice Fest competition.



And speaking of Ouray, check out this video on the area and what it has to offer:

Friday 4 February 2011: JR + PU/SU

JUMP ROPE + PUSH-UPS/SIT-UPS

Jump/Skip rope in 30/30 intervals for twenty minutes performing quick sets of calisthenics during the rest intervals.

This is a challenging workout, but it is effective and very satisfying to complete. During the thirty seconds between sets of rope skipping you will complete a brief set of an additional exercise. Alternate sets of push-ups and sit-ups so that you perform ten sets of each during the twenty minutes.

You do not have long to perform each set. You also will need extra time to transition from skipping to pushing or crunching and back again. Plan to keep the sets small (e.g. 5-20 reps) and allow ~5 seconds for the first transition and 5-10 seconds for the transition back to the rope.

Start with sets of push-ups and sit-ups smaller than you think you can handle. This is a conditioning drill, not a strength workout.

This does not have to be done at an all-out sprint. Find a rhythm and work from one exercise to the other.

Advanced
Complete ten sets of:

• 30/30 Skipping Rope or Jumping Jacks
• A set of Push-ups
• 30/30 Skipping Rope or Jumping Jacks
• A set of Sit-ups

Intermediate - Basic
Complete ten sets of:

• 30/30 Skipping Rope or Jumping Jacks
• A set of Push-ups (go to your knees if necessary)
• 30/30 Skipping Rope or Jumping Jacks
• A set of Crunches

30/30 Interval = 30 seconds work, 30 seconds rest

Tuesday 1 February 2011: CONDITIONING

CONDITIONING INTERVALS

Today's workout uses 30/30 intervals (30 seconds work, 30 seconds rest, repeat for time allotted).

Advanced:

• 5 x 30/30 Jumping Jacks or Jump Rope
• 5 x 30/30 Burpees
• 5 x 30/30 Mountain Climbers
• 5 x 30/30 Squats

Intermediate:

• 5 x 30/30 Jumping Jacks or Jump Rope
• 5 x 30/30 Squat Thrusts (add push-up if possible)
• 5 x 30/30 Mountain Climbers
• 5 x 30/30 Squats

Basic:

• 5 x 30/30 Jumping Jacks or Jump Rope
• 5 x 30/30 Half-Squats or Squat Thrusts
• 5 x 30/30 Mountain Climbers
• 5 x 30/30 Half Squats

February's Great Fitness Experiment: Sandbags! [Plus Creatine Experiment results]

This pic amuses me because I found it on a site under the heading of "preschool crafts". It's titled "Build a sand castle with tin cans." Uh-huh, sure. You're going to write your kid's college admissions essay too aren't you?

"Why are you buying play sand in the middle of a blizzard?" The cashier at home depot looked at me suspiciously as if a mom with 4 kids in tow (and by "in tow" I mean "running in circles around the cart throwing paint cards at each other while the 4-year-old tantrumed next to the candy he couldn't have") would have ulterior motives. "You building them an indoor playground or something?" Ah, she thinks I've lost my mind!

"An indoor sandbox? Certainly not." I may be addled but I'm not insane. "Actually the sand is for a workout." She looked confused so I explained, "I have these canvas bags, see, and I fill them with sand to make them heavier. So I can lift them." I made a weak bicep curling motion.

"Why don't you just use dumbbells?"

Good question. Perfect question in fact. Back when we first Experimented with kettlebells we also got that question a lot. "Why are you swinging those things in here? Just use the weights like a normal non-freakish person already!" But we quickly learned that kettlebells are not just balls with handles. They're canon balls with handles. And it's that very swinging action that makes all the difference between a traditional free-weight workout and a kettlebell workout.

I grabbed my screaming toddler, scooping him up in my arms. Of course he did what he does best: he made a scene flailing and trying to toss himself out of my arms onto the hard concrete floor. Over the screaming I yelled, "The key is the sandbags are an unstable weight! So you have to work harder to lift and stabilize them, just like this..." I looked down at my suddenly still child. "What are you doing?" I hissed. He lay perfectly limp in my arms. The cashier peered over the counter curiously. I jiggled him. "Come on!" His eyes remained closed without a hint of flutter, his little mouth slack and drooling. Had he tantrumed himself into a seizure? I set him down on the bag of sand and we all stared at him. Never have I seen a 4-year-old so absolutely still.

"Should I call someone?" The cashier ventured. At which point he exploded.

"Stop wooking at me! Can't you see I'm invisible??" Mystery solved.

Which brings me to the main reason I am so excited to try sandbags for February's Great Fitness Experiment: sure they're an unstable weight that activates all kinds of smaller muscles and your core and makes weight lifting exponentially more difficult and therefore more rewarding. But the best part is the sandbag is an unstable weight that doesn't humiliate me in public. Yet.

Plus I'm a total fitness nerd and love to geek out over the latest fitness tools (word on the street has it that the krankcycle is coming to our Y!!) so when Josh Henkin contacted me about his Ultimate Sandbag Core Fitness System I tried to restrain my enthusiasm so I wouldn't scare him away. Okay, no I didn't. I squeeed. (Like peeing but with happy sound effects.) I'm professional like that. He sent me the whole package:

You fill up the two black pouches with sand and then place them inside the duffle bag with handles, allowing you to customize the weight. (Note to Y staff: if you see me lugging a heavy black duffle bag around, it is not a bomb.) It also comes with a strap, instructional videos and - my fave part - a poster of sandbag moves that even came with a little piece of masking tape stuck on the upper corner. It's like Josh tore his own poster down off his wall to send to me. Which only makes me treasure it more!

So this month the Gym Buddies and I will still be finishing the Fitblogger Competition for Charity with Lindsey of Lean Bodies but we'll be adding in some special sandbag moves and workouts. If you want to get an idea of what a sandbag workout looks like, here's one from Josh that incorporates the sandbag, the TRX and kettlebells (it's like I died and went to fit heaven!). We're going to try to use the sandbag in every way imaginable, including some workouts from Bodyrock.tv - Freddy and Zuzana are big sandbag fans.

Last Month's Results - Competition and Creatine

For those of you on Team GFE, you already know that we've swept every week and challenge so far (woot woot!) but we still have two more to go and every workout counts towards our final score! No slacking now - keep up the awesome work! For us, the most entertaining aspect of January's Fitblogger Challenge Experiment was the competition aspect. Usually we only have each other to compete with - Gym Buddy Allison and I are notorious for trying to one-up the other - but this month we had new people (strangers even!) to compete with. We were giddy like high schoolers on prom night. That is until Reader Taylor beat my mile time. (I'll catch up with you Taylor, just you wait!)

But the real experimental aspect of January was that both Gym Buddy Megan and I decided to try out creatine. Like I explained before, the monohydrate made me bloat like a pregnant woman (and made about as cranky as one too) so we used GNC's Pro Performance AMP Amplified Creatine 189, a form of creatine ethyl esterase. (Seriously GNC could you have picked a longer name? I think you missed a letter of the alphabet.) The results were unimpressive.

The good news: For those of you worried we were going to bulk out like men, that definitely didn't happen. In fact my high hip measurement went down a 1/2 inch and my low hip went down 1/4 inch.

The bad news: I took measurements of all my muscles and got zero hypertrophy. And before you get all righteously indignant with me, we do lift very heavy at least 3 times a week and yes we are both lean enough where a small change would have been noticeable. We weren't necessarily going for big guns but rather to lean out a little more and that didn't happen either. While I wasn't able to get my body fat percentage tested - the trainer wasn't available this morning - judging from the tape measure, my clothing and the way I look, I don't see a difference so I'm guessing there's not any change there either. Nor did Megan.

The weird news: We took the pills as prescribed, 2 a day on weight lifting days, and we both noticed that we got dizzy and light-headed about an hour after taking them. We both also think that perhaps we did recover from our weight workouts a little faster and had less soreness. Maybe.

My verdict? The bottle's going back to GNC. Yay for their generous return policy!

Anyone want in on the sandbag experiment this month? We'll be posting some more videos of the Gym Buddies and I (badly) doing the moves so you can try it out too. Even if you don't have a super high-tech bag like mine you can get started with a homemade one, a large bag of rice or flour or, if you can catch one, a small child.

Anyone else try the creatine? Have you ever been publicly humiliated by a child?

How Blogging Fueled My Exercise Addiction: A Cautionary Tale

Gymnastic

image from we heart it

Wearing a gold 80's leotard. Climbing a piece of silk 100 feet in the air. Punching until my knuckles bled. Eating beans that could have killed me. I've done a lot of stupid things in the name of health. I got into fitness for the dubious reason of dealing with a past sexual assault and the ensuing court case (nothing like actual running to help you run away from your problems!) so I suppose it only makes sense that my journey to health had a few seriously unhealthy pit stops.

Some of them, like my battle with orthorexia (an obsession with eating so healthy that you become unhealthy), I was very public about. I even went on TV (twice!) to talk about it. But there was a stronger force, an emotional rip tide, that was pulling me under right before everyone's eyes and yet I still tried to hide it. I had a dangerous addiction to exercise.

I'll wait while you finish giggling. It's ok, compulsive over-exercise is officially the mental disorder that everyone "wishes" they had. Despite its apparent benignity, it can - and did for me - have serious consequences. I suffered everything from stress fractures to amenorrhea to depression to the final indignity of having to go to eating disorder therapy.

I haven't ever 'fessed up to this in public yet but my addiction was the reason I started my fitness blog. I needed an outlet for all the crazy. I read dozens of articles, books, studies, websites and, of course, blogs weekly and I needed a place to consolidate it all. I never thought anyone would read it. But you did! And it was a rush like no other. I lived for every comment, e-mail sign up, backlink and page view (stat crack!).

Best of all I found people who were just like me! People who were just as interested in the same arcane studies I was! People who also lived for the feeling of pushing yourself until you see stars, your hearing is deafened and there isn't a single inch of you not drenched in sweat! Most of you were not exercise addicts. But I was. And blogging about fitness was like putting a meth addict in a cement garage with cases of Sudafed.

Eventually I had to come out on my blog. The health consequences had gotten too severe and even I couldn't deny anymore that I had a problem. The support I got from all of you was amazing and to this day I get weepy remembering it. But every time someone - I have many an astute reader and friend - questioned me about the sanity of keeping up my fitness blog while undergoing treatment for compulsive over-exercise, I ignored them. My therapist told me I had to give up my blog, especially once I became pregnant - my health and the baby's health were too important to mess around with, she said. I thought about quitting. But then my therapist left private practice for the prison system (is that not the saddest sentence ever?) and rather than find a new doctor, I quit therapy.

Unbridled, I exercised with such intensity that around my 8th month of pregnancy I found myself crying in the gym bathroom. There was blood everywhere. I tried not to panic. Had I felt my baby kick recently? I couldn't remember. Huddled under the stairwell I called my OBGYN and confessed. The Gym Buddies tried to reassure me that it was all going to be ok - and in the end they were right. All the blood was from damage done to my urethra from the weight of my uterus bouncing off of it. Yes, I was peeing blood but that was good news because it meant I hadn't hurt my baby or the placenta or anything else vital. It shook me up bad enough that I took a break from high-intensity exercise until the baby was born. (Healthy, gorgeous, every bit a miracle Jelly Bean is!)

The crazy, unfortunately, did not stop with her birth. Now, I didn't have to worry about hurting her and I worried a lot about losing the weight. There were copious tears, arguments with my husband and lengthy conversations with my sister but I'll cut to the chase: I quit blogging June 28, 2010. It was my 32nd birthday and I finally realized that I wasn't going to be able to work through my mental issues and blog about fitness at the same time.

Clearly that didn't last (or you wouldn't be reading this!) but when I did it, I meant it. I barely touched a computer for a month and instead spent that time teaching myself to "eat intuitively" and by extension to "exercise intuitively." I played with my children without trying to somehow turn it into a workout. I went on dates with my husband where we'd just sit. But after a month I had a realization: as much as I had needed to quit blogging, now I needed to blog again. This time, though, it wasn't out of a desire to fuel an unhealthy obsession. This time it was because I deeply missed all my readers and blog friends who had become true friends. It was because I wanted to share my passion for health and fitness. It was because I love to write almost more than I love to breathe. And partly, it was so I could warn others about falling into the same trap I did.

As bloggers, we're very passionate about what we do - we wouldn't do it otherwise, considering all the work that goes into it - but with that passion comes a danger of being consumed by what we love. Whether it's exercise like me, or cooking, or even blogging about our kids there comes a line where you realize you're blogging about your life more than living it.

I couldn't tell you guys all of this at the time. It was still too close and I'm sorry for that. I left without much of an explanation and I returned without any explanation and I still feel bad about that. Honestly I'm still trying to figure out how to find a healthy balance with blogging and with exercise and you have been nothing but patient and loving with me. Your support, e-mails, comments, and tweets mean so much to me. I cannot thank you enough for this. While I may have started blogging for the wrong reasons, I'm continuing it for all the right ones.

Moral of the story: Don't be me.

Alternate moral: I love you!

How do you balance your online life with your real life? Anyone else ever have to make a big confession on their blog? If you're a blogger, have you ever felt like your blog ran your life rather than the other way around?

Do Boobs Make the Fit Woman? [The Controversy Over Breast Implants in Fitness Models]

Image from Natalie Dee

"Knockers!" "Jugs!" "Fun bags!" "Sweater puppies!" Sitting in the darkened audience at the talent show my friend put on as a fundraiser for breast cancer research, I listened as all my friends called out their favorite euphemisms for boobs. I wanted to contribute - what's more fun than sitting in a big room talking girlie bits with all your best girls? (And no men, we weren't wearing panties and having pillow fights.) - but the pressure mounted as all the good ones were getting taken. Looking down for inspiration, it came to me: "Rocks in socks!" I blurted out. Silence. Then my friend next to me giggled, "Really??" I stood firm in my answer. "Indeed."

Nursing four babies has not been kind to me in the chest department. Sure I look amazing as long as I'm slinging the milk shakes but as soon as my drive-in becomes take-out only, I end up worse than before I began. And I'm not the only one. Plastic surgery is a topic that comes up among the Gym Buddies from time to time - it did this very morning in fact! (See, now don't you wish you came and worked out with us?) While there are a couple Buddies holding out for a tummy tuck and one who wants a reduction, the rest of us, if money grew on trees, would get the girls fixed.

Part of it is because while we can lose the baby weight with nutrition and exercise, we can never fix the saggy bits and we'd just like to have our old selves back. But part of it - the part we don't talk about very much - is based on a fundamental unrealistic yet oddly pervasive belief in the fitness world: that you can be very lean and still have very big boobs.

Image from Muscle and Fitness Hers

Reader Juni, obviously tuned in to the Gym-Buddy wavelength, sent me this question:

"So I buy just about every fitness magazine on the market and I gotta say that it makes me sad that I find it quite rare if I see even ONE model without breast implants. It’s such a strange contradiction, you know???? I mean, I do get it, you have a low body fat percentage and you likely have what I like to call “Boobinis”. Yet, as a women who works out to feel strong and happy with her capable body it makes me sad to see this and conflicted…. "

Juni makes an excellent point (and also "boobinis" is hilarious - I'm totally stealing that one from now on!) In case you missed 8th grade health class, breasts are largely made up of fat. So if you lean way out, reason stands that your chest will disappear just like the fat off your stomach. This is a conundrum for fitness models. Traditionally female "fitness models" had a very specific look, something akin to this:

Body fat low enough to show 6-pack abs yet still enough on top to fill out a sports bra with cleavage! Image from Muscle and Fitness Hers

While it's no secret that in the larger world of movie stars, Maxim and reality TV shows stick thin with grapefruit halves is highly desirable, you'd think that in the health and fitness realm with its emphasis on muscle mass over Barbie limbs that we'd get some slack in the chestal department. Not so. If anything, breast implants seem more prevalent in fitness modelling than typical women's modelling.

While some fitness professionals, like the ever-controversial Zuzana of bodyrock.tv, are unapologetic about their augmented assets, others are starting to buck the trend. Top fitness model Kim Strother (if you have read any health or fitness mag in the last two years I can guarantee you've seen her, even if you don't know her as anything other than "girl demonstrating ab crunches on large exercise ball") talks openly about losing jobs because she refuses to enlarge her athletic chest.

Self magazine's features director/fitness Meagan Murphy calls Strother the "new-school archetype" saying that she is "healthy, strong and aspirational." Murphy adds, "The supermodel won the genetic lottery. The fitness model worked damn hard for that body, and you can tell." She even points out that Strother differs from traditional female models in that most of the sample clothes sent for photo shoots are a size medium to accommodate her athletic build.

Kim Strother, full-time fitness model. Image from Slate.com

Normally "athletic build" is seen as a derogatory term - I remember the first time a gymnastics coach told me I had "athletic thighs" I cried for a week and went on a crash diet - but these days some fitness magazines want a model that can do more than just look pretty in booty shorts. They need someone strong enough to hold a plank in the sand for five minutes while wardrobe and lighting are adjusted, someone who can jump 83 times in the air to get the perfect "spontaneous" shot, someone who can demonstrate proper squatting form. And with online video complements to articles, that is getting harder and harder to fake.

Personally I hope that Strother is the wave of the future, if only for the fact that with as many kids as I have there's no way I'll ever be able to afford implants (and also, did you know you have to replace them every decade or so? A little too high maintenance for this surgery-squeamish girl!). On the other hand, I had two mommy friends get implants just this last week and they're super happy with the results (or at least they will be when the swelling goes down.)

What do you think - is the fake boobs/tiny figure still the gold standard or do you think smaller boobs are the next big thing? Are implants a way to restore you back to you and increase confidence or are they just more evidence of the unrealistic standard women's bodies are judged by? Do you have a favorite term for your boobs?

PS. Check out Slate.com's entire fitness issue for more interesting stuff like this - thanks to the reader who tipped me off to this! I wish I could remember who but I'm totally having a brain fart - leave me a comment so I can give you proper credit!

Conditions Report - January 26 2011

NORTHWEST:

--Looks like a large part of road the has been washed out on the Mountain Loop Highway, and is down to a one-way road. Click here for more info.

--What's up with this warm weather? Saturday brought some nice sunshine to the PNW -- What did you do? One person went to Erie this weekend. Another party did Dragontail but woke up to sunny conditions Sunday. Yet another party's climbing excitement was replaced by skiing excitement as they made a decent of Leuthold Couloir on Mt. Hood. 

--Forecasts are in the high 30s and low 40's in the Baker area this week. 

--Forecast for the West Slope of the Cascades.

--Forecast for the East Slope of the Cascades.

--Webcam for Leavenworth and the Stuart Range.

--Forecast for Mount Rainier.-- Route and Conditions Report from Mt. Baker Rangers: Mount Baker Climbing Blog.

--Forest Service Road Report for Mount Baker-Snoqualmie National Forest.

--Mount Saint Helens, Mount Adams conditions and recreation report.

--Webcams for Mount Rainier National Park, North Cascades National Park, Leavenworth.

--An up-to-date ski and snow report for the Northwest may be found here.

--Up-to-date Pacific Northwest ice conditions may be found here.

RED ROCK CANYON:

--What's the road like to Black Velvet? The last comment on the page is note worthy. Click here. The last time that road was graded was in 1999.

--The scenic loop drive now closes at 5pm. See this thread and the BLM site for more information.

--Forecast and average temperatures for Red Rock Canyon.

--Webcam for Red Rock Canyon National Conservation Area.

--The late exit and overnight permit number for Red Rock Canyon is 702-515-5050. If there is any chance that you will be inside the park after closing, be sure to call this number so that you don't get a ticket.

--The entrance to the scenic drive had a parking area for those who wanted to carpool up until approximately April of 2009. That lot has now become employee parking and people who want to carpool are required to park at the lot outside the Scenic Drive exit.

--The scenic drive currently opens its gates at 6 in the morning.

JOSHUA TREE:


--Forecast and average temperatures for Joshua Tree National Park.

--Webcam for Joshua Tree National Park.

-- As winter use in Joshua Tree is growing, camping can be difficult at times.  It is not a bad idea to come with a back-up plan if the park campgrounds are full.  Here are the NPS Campground Details. Some people like to stay at the rural campground often referred to as "The Pit."  And lastly, there is a campground available at Joshua Tree Lake.

--The Joshua Tree entrance fee is currently $15 per vehicle.  Your receipt will give you access to the park for seven days after its initial purchase.  Rangers check this receipt at each of the major access points going in and out.  Annual passes are available for $30.

--Here is a link to a website dedicated to the events surrounding Joshua Tree National Park's 75th anniversary in 2011.  Check it out for up-to-date news on the park and the things going on to celebrate this historic park "birthday."

SIERRA:

--For up-to-date avalanche and weather reports in the Eastern Sierra, click here. Avy conditions are still considerable in some areas.

--Webcams for Bishop, June Lake, Mammoth Mountain, Mono Lake, Tioga Pass.

--Permits to hike to the top of Half Dome are now required seven days per week when the cables are up. This is an interim measure to increase safety along the cables while the park develops a long-term plan to manage use on the Half Dome Trail.  A maximum of 400 permits will be issued each of these days (300 of these permits are available to day hikers).  To read more, click here.

ALASKA RANGE:

--Conditions in the range are not currently available.  But we are taking reservations for both Alaska Range Ascents and Denali trips.  To learn more, click here.  We will begin regular conditions reports in the Alaska Range in late April.

ALPS:


--Chamonix and Mont Blanc Regional Forecasts may be found here.

--Webcams for Chamonix Valley, Zermatt and the Matterhorn.

Vegas

Check out a post I put together for the Mountain Hardwear blog on my trip to Vegas. I also edited a video that you can find there.

http://www.mountainhardwear.com/Blog-Post/BlogPost,default,pg.html?bpid=2011_1_14_MattWilder_RedRocks

Retrievable Fixed Line

Canyoneering tricks are often extremely applicable to rock and alpine climbing. The little trick featured in this video could easily be used by a party setting up a toprope on a sketchy edge or -- as in the video -- by a party rigging a rappel on a weird lip.

This technique is most applicable with a larger group that needs a fixed line. With a small group, the first climber could just belay the second climber down to him after building the anchor.

The crux of this trick is played out in the video very quickly. Watch closely at the 1:50 second mark.



I'm not sure that I'm all that excited about the ratty sling and the quicklink shown in the video. Before committing to anything, it's really important to make sure that your anchor is completely solid.

In review, the steps are as follows:

1. Belayer belays climber out to edge.
2. Climber at edge builds an anchor and fixes the line.
3. The climber at the top converts the line by running it through the quicklink and clipping a carabiner to a clove-hitch on the backside. This could also be done by running the rope around a tree or a boulder. If you do it through a tree or a boulder, be sure that there isn't too much friction and that the line could still be retrieved.
4. Once the line is fixed on both ends, a climber could clip in with a sling to a carabiner to descend or the climber could put a friction hitch on the rope. A friction hitch would provide a higher level of security.
5. Only one person should move on the fixed line at once.
6. The last person will bring down the backside of the fixed line, the end that is not running through the quicklink.
7. Once the rope is released from the anchor, it will be able to be easily pulled down.

--Jason D. Martin